The Beauty of Singleness

15 April, 2013

Jesus said: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. (Matthew 22:37)

Western culture tells us that dating around is normal. And why not? What's the harm in dating? Why sit alone on a Saturday night when we could be out at a movie with that cute boy from math class? Girls miss no opportunity to dress up, hold his hand, and stare into his dreamy eyes.

Before realizing that Christ was enough, I felt I had an obligation to find a boyfriend. I liked the idea of feeling protected, thinking that a boyfriend would instantly help me feel loved and cared for. I wanted to hear that I looked pretty, and I longed to have a boyfriend that could text me cute messages. If I had someone, I wouldn't have to be alone and face problems on my own.

Since then, Jesus has shown me true life, allowing me to bask in His glorious presence and feel His security always. The Lord has shown me that the idea of dating was nothing more than empty snatches at happiness. He disclosed that true love doesn't exist without Him, giving me enough joy to understand that He alone provides true satisfaction. Even the best boyfriend in the world couldn’t outdo the love of Christ!

Contrary to society’s lies, singleness is nothing to scoff at. In fact, it’s the most beautiful, peaceful, Godly time of our lives. When else can we put all of our time and energy into a relationship with our one true prince, Jesus? In Matthew 22, Jesus tells us to "love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." We cannot love someone without learning to love God first. As Christians, we know that even if we try to take control, the Lord ultimately determines our steps. (Psalm 16:9) So what's the point of dating if God already has a man, and a plan, prepared?

Being single is the most sacred time of our lives. In 1 Corinthians 7, Paul explains that “the married woman is anxious about worldly things, (including) how to please her husband.” As single women, we don’t have to please anyone besides God! We have no fear of getting our hearts broken knowing that Jesus is holding us in His strong hands. The Psalms explain that Godly women are “beautifully and wonderfully made,” and because I’ve accepted this, I don’t need a boy to tell me so.

Just to clarify: dating is not wrong. But, as for me, I'm leaving it up to the Lord and kissing the idea of dating goodbye. I don’t need to worry about searching for my future husband because I know that God will provide him at the right time. God already knows who I’ll ultimately marry, but He wants me to be single right now in order to grow closer to Him. Instead of searching myself, I've decided to give God the pen to write my love story with no intention of taking it back.

I probably will get married some day. 1 John 3:22 says that “whatever we ask we receive from Him, because we keep His commandments and do what pleases Him.” God knows that I eventually want a husband, but now is not my time. Until then, I will be perfectly content dating God, the only one who can “strengthen me, help me, and uphold me with His righteous right hand.” With promises like that, singleness is much less of a struggle and more of a joyful time focused on His glory alone! Amen!