Livin' Young and Wild and Free
05 July, 2015
I had helicopter parents growing up. They're both very driven people, and they have found great success both athletically and professionally throughout their recent years. Likewise, they wanted the same for me. They wanted me to "keep my eye on the prize" toward becoming a talented competitive swimmer, consequently meaning I wasn't allowed to do a whole lot for fear of detrimentally hurting my goals.
If there was a football game on a Friday night with a swim meet Saturday morning, I usually wouldn't be there. If there was a party, with or without a swim meet the following day, I definitely wouldn't be there. They kept pretty close tabs on me.
Because of their constant reminders to strive toward success, I began to rebel, just like 99% of other 16-year-olds. I had become quite efficient at sneaking out of my window with someone to pick me up down the road late at night to hang out with all the kids with "cool parents" who actually let them leave.
I also rebelled with my schoolwork. Since I was swimming a few hours every day (and actually really loved it), I had zero motivation for studying or homework completion. I became known as that girl who would copy other people's homework and do anything possible to slide by with an A or B using little to no effort. And, point blank, I saw no problem with it. "If I have to swim like a dolphin and live on (basically) house arrest, I am so not trying hard in school."
High school turned into college, meaning one thing: freedom. Freedom to go out when I wanted, to hang out with anyone, to go anywhere, to be my own person. As you can probably guess, the word "no" was not part of my vocabulary. I was down for any party - any adventure - any time. If someone wanted to go out, they knew they could call me because I'd absolutely be there. Below, you can hear one of my theme songs of my freshman/sophomore years of college.
Once September of junior year rolled around, I started to feel weird about parties. I'd wake up the next morning feeling gross and bad about myself - and it wasn't just the alcohol. It was like my soul felt gross. A sorority sister of mine invited me to tag along to a chapel service on campus on a Sunday night (after having been to a party the night beforehand) and everything all changed. Seeing kids (cool kids at that) willingly at church, raising their hands and praising God, the fog started to clear in my head.
"Maybe these parties are actually not all that great for me (ya think). Maybe that's why I'm feeling so crummy. I thought I was living 'Young, Wild, and Free' like the song, but it's more like 'Young, Wild, and Enslaved.'"
Enslaved I was. Enslaved to my body image, enslaved to not wanting to miss out , enslaved to thinking I needed boys to call my pretty to know my worth. And that very night, I made a decision. I would continue to live 'Young, Wild, and Free,' except now I'd REALLY be free. I'd be wildly in love with Jesus of Nazareth, and free from the bondage of attempting to band-aid my brokenness the wrong way.
Am I mad at my parents for doing what they know was best for me? Not at all. Funny, too, I'm back living at home and things are just the opposite. "It's Friday night, Paige, go find a boy and go out for a drink for goodness 
sakes!" Thanks mom and dad. You did this to me.
Do I regret sneaking out of my bedroom window, cheating on tests, and becoming a party animal? Nope. Of course, it led to lots of heartache and brokenness, but it also turned me into the woman I am today. A woman who knows the world has nothing to offer because I've tried it all. I've tried finding my worth in boys. I've tried taking lines of shots at parties. I've tried smoking weed. I've tried everything. Where did it leave me? Depressed, confused, and with a plummeted self-worth.
Do I still go out? On occasion. Do I go overboard? No. Am I living young, wild, and free? Everyday baby. The chains of this world have nothing on me because I hold the key to unlock them all: Jesus.
The next time you hear Wiz Khalifa's single on KISS FM, think about it: Are you actually free? Or have the very things which promised freedom actually become your master?
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. 2 Corinthians 5
