Finding My House
22 July, 2015
Lately, I've been debating the idea of moving out and getting my own place. I graduated from college last spring in California, moved to Guatemala for a few months, and have been living with good ol' mom and pops back in Wisconsin the last 8. I do love it, really, I do. But the idea of having my own home sounds verrry appealing.
Long story short, I prayed lots and lots about it and decided to stay home (seeing as part of me envisions myself venturing off again). I still toured a couple houses just for kicks, cuz, why not right? The house pictured above is well over $1 million and I obviously could not afford that, but I figured, "why not check it out anyways?"
It was beyond beautiful. It rested on its own beach on Lake Michigan with a big white gazebo. I was in love.
I've gotten really into interior design and architecture recently, and this particular house hit everything on my dream wishlist. It was right across the street from a private school I could potentially send my future kids to, it had a beautifully designed outdoor deck, the landscaping was impeccable, and, and, and... Love.
But, after spending about an hour roaming the house, I started to feel empty inside. I started to feel discontent with what I had, feeling like I needed...
- this house
- an adorable husband
- 3 kids
- a white, fluffy Labradoodle
- a jetski, pontoon, and speed boat
- a country club membership
...like, pronto. I started thinking about all my friends (also 23!) with husbands and homes and little babies. I started to think about how "behind" I felt for not having those things. I started to feel embarrassed, wondering if all this "waiting on God" was really going to pay off.
It was so bad, that once I got home I asked my parents (with a dead serious face) if they could help give me a loan to buy the house. They looked at me like I was nuts, and it took about .05 seconds to realize they were right. "What on Earth are you thinking, Paige?" they asked. I had no answer, because I really didn't even know.
Shaking my head, wondering why I ever thought that was a good idea, I sat down to read the greatest book ever written:
My Father's house has many mansions; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? John 14:2
I find myself getting so darn caught up in this life. I daydream about my future, half excited and half scared to death. Lusting after a life I don't have is no way to find contentment. John 14:2 clearly states how Jesus is preparing a mansion for us in His personal Kingdom - a mansion much better than the one I was recently touring.
The point of Christianity is hope in our eternity in Heaven (through Jesus). The sad part is, the hope of eternity is something I rarely ever think about. I think about this Earth and the things I'd like to do and accomplish during my short little life here. Instead, why am I not thinking about spending forever with Jesus? The land of "golden streets" and "emerald walls" and a "sea clear as glass" with "no darkness" and "eternal joy" is awaiting. (all listed in the book of Revelation)
Half of me wants to start a family, and half of me wants to be a kid forever. I never know what I want, and I'm starting to realize that's just fine. I don't need a mansion. I don't need a husband. I definitely don't need a jetski, speedboat, and pontoon. But I do need Jesus.
We never know what God will bless us with on this Earth. Maybe someday by the grace of God I'll wake up in that house with a Godly man by my side. Or, maybe I won't. Either way, it doesn't matter, because in 100 years it'll be long gone. By then, you and I will be relaxing in our personalized Heavenly mansion playing golf with Moses (lol, ya never know!)
In the meantime, let's plan to find contentment in our circumstances, because...
...our God shall supply all our needs according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19
And just for fun, I included some pictures of the house I toured. Beautiful, huh? Just think - how much more beautiful will our Heavenly mansions be... ☺️
